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Excerpts From an Untitled Memoir

“Why can’t I ever just take a cute selfie?”, thought Katie. Then after scrolling through her latest failed photo session one more time, it dawned on her. “It’s because I have gorilla hands!!!!!” She was always told she had “piano fingers”, long and slender. But 10 years of piano and she could hardly knock out mary had a little lamb on the ivories. They were in fact massive gorilla hands that were 3 times the size of her phone making it impossible to take an Instagram worthy selfie. People were gonna think she was crazy, but she had plenty of proof! Just look at those mitts! Thank god the spaceship that is the iPhone 6 is out. Maybe that will fit in her gorilla grip!

hand 1 hand2


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